These Mortals Be
by melraemorgan
Summary: Sheldon deals with the news Sam has given him.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: First time Private Practice fic. This may be the beginning of something I'm not sure. I only know that there is a dearth of Sheldon fics out there which to me is a travesty. His is one of the most complex characters in tv drama today and deserves to have fanfics written about him. Let me know if you're interested in more of this story.

Disclaimer : I do NOT own.

Read, review, whatever.

Sheldon stared down into the nearly empty tumbler as if it would hold some answer for him, some reason why this _thing_ was happening. He wouldn't name it, he refused. He could hear Sam saying the same words over and over again, and it didn't matter he would not accept it. Sheldon was tired of having to be the good guy, the optimistic guy, the grown up. He wanted to pick up his cut crystal high ball glass and throw it through his office window; he wanted to scream _"Fuck this!" _at the top of his voice. But he wouldn't. No, he would just sit there and drink his scotch and remain outwardly calm. He wouldn't even get truly drunk he had a patient coming in and then Pete's wake thing, where he would have a few drinks, be the voice of reason, and then go home and let the rage and fear engulf him. Alone, always alone… No matter what he did that's how he ended up, alone... It made no difference how shiny his armor was, or the size of the dragons he slayed, the women he wanted never wanted him.

_Stop. If you keep this up you will lose it… Besides what does it matter now? _

He laughed; it was a bitter harsh sound full of pain and cynicism. He finished the last swallow of the tawny liquid and set the glass down, closed the bottle and returned it to his drawer. Smoothing back his hair in a nervous gesture he composed himself and put his clinical mask back in place. He had a patient, and didn't everyone else come before him anyway?


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I guess there was another chapter. But as this is somewhat canon I am waiting for more info. Of course I may just go AU and write it my way…

Disclaimer: I do NOT own.

Read & Review

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Sheldon walked into his empty apartment struggling to shake the day off. It clung to him like the cloying smell of dead roses. First his diagnosis, the suicidal pedophile, and then the antics of his grief stricken friends, it all piled onto him crushing every bit of optimism from his soul, leaving him bereft and hopeless. This is why he didn't believe, he couldn't afford to be this enraged at a supreme being; instead he would suffer in silence over the pathetic state of humanity. What good did it do him anyway? Nothing ever changed and he was always being screwed over by life and people. Yet Sheldon kept on fighting the good fight, being the good guy, the voice of reason and sound thinking. Why? It didn't seem to make a difference. He was still going to die all alone with nothing to show for his life. The futility of it was stifling.

"I'm tired." He said aloud to the empty apartment.

With a sigh he sank down into the cushions of his couch and soon drifted off into a fitful sleep.

The next day he awoke with his face glued to the couch.

_Crap…I overslept…_

He couldn't help wondering if this fatigue he was feeling was just a harbinger of things to come. He speculated whether he ought to bother going to work at all. The phone rang next to him on the floor jarring him from his depressing reverie.

"Hello."

"Sheldon where the hell are you? You have a patient sitting here."

Charlotte's strident tone hit him like a bucket of ice water and he was immediately awake.

"I'm sorry. I'll be right there."

Charlotte took a breath and asked, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine I just overslept. I'm leaving now see you when I get there."

"Alright…" Charlotte replied skeptically.

Sheldon hung up before Charlotte could press the issue. He dressed for work in a frenzy and left a few minutes later. With some aggressive driving he arrived at work twenty minutes later. He rushed in breathlessly and saw his perturbed patient sitting on the waiting room couch.

"Cathy, I am so sorry I'm late. Are you able to stay and have our session?"

She looked up at him her arms crossed and sighed. "It's okay it happens to all of us, but I can't stay I have to get to work. Can we reschedule?"

"Certainly, I'll take a look at my book and call you to find a time that fits your schedule. Okay?"

She smiled and stood up and turned to leave.

"Yeah that should work. Bye Dr. Wallace, I hope your day goes better."

"Thank you Cathy I hope yours does too."

She nodded and walked out.

"Well that could have been a lot worse."

Sam walked up behind Sheldon.

"What could have been worse?"

Sheldon jumped in surprise.

"Dammit Sam, do you have to sneak up on me?"

"I don't know, do I?"

Sheldon sighed, "Look, can we _not _do this?"

"No." Sam stared at him.

"I told you I didn't want to talk about it." Sheldon replied tensely.

"Sheldon, you need the biopsy."

"I am not talking about this again so leave me the hell alone."

Sheldon turned on his heel and stomped into his office, closed the door and shut the blinds.

Sam stared after him a moment before throwing up his hands and walking into the kitchen. He opened the fridge and stared into it as if he would find some solution to this problem with Sheldon hidden amongst the yogurt and salad.

"Sam, you okay?" Violet asked.

He stood up and shut the door to the fridge.

"Yeah, why?"

"Well it's just that you were standing there a long time."

"Oh, you know, just thinking."

"Yeah, about what?"

"Okay Violet don't go all shrinky on me. Haven't you ever stared into the refrigerator?"

She smiled. "Yeah actually I have."

Sam smiled in return. "Alright, since the fridge holds no answers for me I suppose I could ask you."

"Sure, go ahead."

"Well I have this patient. His PSA is through the roof but he refuses to let me do the biopsy. See his father had prostate cancer and he says that his Dad was never the same man after the diagnosis and he doesn't want to end up the same way."

"Ooh that's a tough situation. Is he normally a reasonable guy?"

"He's probably the most reasonable man I've ever met."

"Then this is obviously a very emotional thing for him. I say give him some space and a chance to make the right decision. Just be sure he understands the consequences of avoiding the test."

"He understands. I guess I'll give him some time before I bring it up again, but I'm worried about what's at stake here. He could have an aggressive form of cancer and this putting things off may be a death sentence."

"If he truly understands that then there's nothing more you can do. You have to let him choose."

Sam nodded and took a deep breath. "Thanks Violet, I think I'll give him some time but after a week I'm going to confront him again."

"Sounds like a plan."

"I'll see you later." He walked out toward his office.

Violet watched him go and then turned to stare into the refrigerator herself.


End file.
